Tag Archives: I love you

A Poem for Cacilia


Sleepy Cacilia

I took this photo of my Sleepy Girlfriend, I like it. She is completely crazy (Just like me!) and I love her for it. Cacilia, this is for you.

A Poem for Cacilia

With you I’m in my mind,

Without you I’m out it,

A normal life need not apply,

How about we go around it,

I don’t want to fight with you,

And you don’t want to fight me,

I am your pipedream,

Living happily,

We could be two dancing freaks.

Two titled psychopaths,

Getting out of these dry clothes fast,

High blood pressure,

We laugh at killing each other’s plans.

We’re both black-belts in danger,

We’re both each other’s guardian angels,

The legs to each other’s table,

To love each other we’re both capable.

No one can stop us,

Nonsense is lost in us,

Frostbitten accosted us,

You’re so gorgeous to touch.

When life gets too much,

I’m by your side,

And when our time is up,

I’ll fight for one more night.

Is this a trick or is it love?

If it is then my heart is ripped,

And this song can be written in blood.

You can be my partner in crime,

I will lay my heart on the line,

From start to finish, I will travel through time,

Just to die at the same time.

Even through heaven or Hell,

You put a spell on my world,

For better or worse,

I fell in love with this girl’s every single detail.

Now if it was the end of us,

It would be the end of my world,

I’m in the centre of hell,

When a day passes without you,

I’m running naked in the rain,

This whole universe could slate me,

You saved me from this pain,

Someone shake him he’s crazy,

You can either love me or hate me,

This comes deep from within and still I’m falling,

I just wanted you to know you will always be my baby and I love you, I am calling.

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Filed under 2014, Blog, crazy, Creative Writing, Literacy, Love, Mental Health, Misc, Poem, Poems, Poetry, Uncategorized, Writer, Writing, Writing #2

Love In The Time Of Mental Illness


Toxic Schizophrenia

Toxic Schizophrenia (Photo credit: Rachel Tropea)

They made me so I couldn’t love you and love within the innocent moment is ultimate destroyer. I have been created for the purposes for a few; for their jobs to flourish when they jab in the meds, or the punching bag from the loved ones who are having a bad-day, or even the jump-stone for the surgeon women who like to play around with the heartstrings because they flutter as butterflies from relationship to relationship. I am damaged and this does not help.

Love is a wildfire so beautiful to look at but so dangerous if not contained. But my silent aggressors are watching, you do not see them but they see you as they live within me. Do not worry, death is only an extension of life, come help me deliver leaflets, hand in hand.

You will need Electric-Shock-Therapy now to get a beat from my dying heart. Welcome to Love in the Time of Mental Illness. This pen can make me lose my mind, again. A hug from me comes with a free strait-jacket, keep your distance. Perhaps my paranoid-schizophrenia is kicking up a fuss going head to head with another heart.

I wish for wishful thinking, but choking on this wishbone is my killer.  So I wish for one more wish. I got you, now all I want is to keep you. I hold a new world for you within my shirt pocket. Within me is only without you; purely damaged. I hate this feeling of love; I know you’d leave one way or another. Hurt is all you really know what to give. It has happen before, so the paranoia becomes a pill that numbs the tongue and brings forth the thoughts of your betrayal. I should run from the pills as you have run from me. Now I am what you fear, I have been given a number/statistic, I now have no more name to give you in marriage. But I am mentally ill also I am a creative-writer, I can make one up.

I will be wed to this forever no more cheating on my illness with you. I have given into it this curse I can hex you with. Love is only a word…. And mental-illness is two.

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Filed under 2013, Articles, Author, Blog, Blook, Life, Literacy, Love, Mental Health, Writer, Writing, Writing #2

Falling In Love


holding hands

Falling In Love

I have finally fell in love and it is about to destroy me on this skyscrapers rooftop.

“Please, get back from the edge!” I shout at her unlistening ears. She has her arms open wide, ready to be caught by deaths grip and be auctioned off to the night at half price for her half-life. She is standing in her spotlight from the night’s sky with the idea of stepping down from her stage to end her final act. The moon is laughing at our light.

“Just look at me; just look at me… please.” The tears free fall from my face. The wind pushes against her, whispering warnings of what is to come as it makes her hair whip and dance. Gravity is the middle man within our triangle but bargaining with his power on his edge, results in death. She must remember me as she is still wearing the white dress I had bought her, if she only she took my arm and we take off to pursue life together again, hand in hand before death do us part. Her heart is cheating beats which is slowly killing her, this is the reasoning behind us being here.

“What will I do if you do this?” I ask her. “You will go on without me.” She replies calmly. This is a nightmare. “But the best dreams happen in real life; don’t you want to be part of that?” She turns her head to the misty rain that has begun to lie upon the horizon making everything distort, life is bleaker than the weather.

“If you do this, food will taste like it has been poisoned, water will seem dry and time will have no hands to save you.” She adds to the rain with her tears.

“Life is like a strand of hair, it can be as long as you want or as short as you need it, isn’t that my decision?” She says quietly to the wind. “In sickness or in Health… I said those words to you and you alone; I never backed away from what I pledged!” I plead to her emotions. So why is this happening. I look at my phone thinking about dialing for help but it is already too late. Love is the killer to the heart, not the sword or arrow but used as a weapon against itself.

“We can get the help, the doctor said there was still time.” I say almost giving up. Whoso findeth a wife, findeth a good thing, but bad things soon follow. I throw my sight to the floor, collapsed eyelids and all.

“Come with me.” She wind-whispers to me, I don’t make eye contact; searching for a new answer to our old problem. Thunder murmurs from behind the black clouds which are passing over head. Weather calls for extreme conditions; angels will fall as the world sits by and listens. I nod slowly, holding back the right thing to say. She holds out the hand I have always held, I walk over and take hold, bringing myself up to her new level of living. I look down, the streets seem like mazes for mice and the people are going about their business, unknowingly.

“We shall take on death together.” I say to her, brushing her hair behind her ear. She wraps her arms around me and presses her head against my chest. “I love you so much. Whither thou goest I will go. That is my purpose.” She says. The destruction of my world is true love I gift upon you, dismantling my heart and sharing the pieces equally between us, who could want more? “I love you too.” I say. We tilt to the side within a deep breath of one another. We fall, still gazing into the eyes we wake up to each morning. It still puts a smile on my face. The roar and scorn of the wind rages passed our ear.

“Any regrets?!” I shout. “Not loving you longer.” She replies. Kissing me as the ground creeps closer. This is how you fall into love.

(Thanks for reading. It was an epic story, wasn’t it?)

Keeping my pen busy….

Alex

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Filed under 2014, Articles, Author, Blog, Blogging, Books, Creative Writing, Entertainment, Fiction, Life, Literacy, Literary Agent, Love, Mental Health, Misc, Random, Relationships, Short Fiction Stories, Story, Tales, Teen, Uncategorized, Writer, Writing, Writing #2